A COUPLE OF MONTHS ago I cleaned out bookshelves from "inherited" books which do not support my present values and do not support, illumine and enhance the philosophy I believe in. Just when I was about to throw out one of the books, my eyes fell on its title: The right words at the right time--a New York Times Bestseller nonetheless. It was filled with short contributions of famous people from Muhammad Ali to President Jimmy Carter, Betty Ford to Lance Armstrong, Itzhak Perlman to Jennifer Anni-ston, business tycoons, movie stars and politicians alike. They all wrote about meaningful words they had read or heard--just at the right moment--and that had moved them in the right direction, when they needed it most.
     Putting down the book I could not help but curiously search my memory bank for a spontaneous flashback of significant words somebody had said to me. Instantly I saw the presence of Mrs Irving on my inner computer screen.
     When I was in my late teens I went to London as a mother’s helper, then a popular way to learn a new language. The Irving’s were a wonderful family, with two small children, Caroline 3, and Charles 5. Mr and Mrs Irving were both balanced and friendly people. Charles took after them and was a delightfully happy child. Caroline went through a phase of rebellion and it was not always easy for me to get her to do what was expected of her. One evening at bathing time she cried and refused vehemently: No, I do not want to take a bath, she said again and again. Finally I took her hand, gave her a pat on her backside and said: Yes, you will. Crying even louder she ran straight downstairs into her mothers arms. Sylvia hit me, Sylvia hit me, she cried. I would have liked to disappear into the ground, because how could I make a mother believe the truth when I expected she would scold me in the usual protective defense of a mother toward her charming little princess. Yet, Mrs Irving looked straight at Caroline and said quietly: IF she did, she must have had a very good reason. Instantly Caroline stopped crying and this time willingly took my hand, knowing that against the integrity of her mother she did not stand a chance of playing games.
     I was like on a cloud. Somebody knew me and believed in me and actually stood up for me without belittling Caroline nor me in the process. From then on I noticed many of these miracles of integrity in Mrs Irving. I was an inexperienced housekeeper and nanny, but Mrs Irving never made a reproach for things I messed up. Not only did she not make remarks, but as much as I looked and expected it, her face, her voice, or attitude never showed the slightest anger or impatience with my shortcomings.
     I know she would laugh if I called her an "angel", but for me she is--being the right example at the right time, saying the right words, which I have never forgotten.
     In later years, now familiar with the law of cause and effect, I pondered why she consistently showed such integrity towards me, even when I expected otherwise. Well, the conclusion is very simple and it is the second lesson she taught me: When I have integrity, I am unaware of anything unlike it. Integrity sees integrity! Wholeness sees wholeness! Love sees Love!
     It is so simple!

Sylvia M Enz, PhD
Director,
Worldwide Healing Ministry